Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Music

By Trevor A. Keveloh

Music. Whether is be The Beatles, Madonna, Hendrix, TOOL, Rihanna, Elton John or NIN it does something to all of us. Music makes us move, it makes us think, we can literally listen to it anywhere now. We can live out our childhood, we can reenact our teen years, we can embrace our twenties while listening to it anywhere. A bar, club, the gym, home, car, almost anywhere we go, we have music.

What music does to ME is it brings me to another place. Sometimes the past, mostly the present and occasionally the future. But ultimately it makes me FEEL, desire, it makes me love and it makes me think, and on occasion, it makes me HURT. Music is my personal pinnacle of art because you can do so much with music. Some bands are just bands and I will always appreciate that and respect that. But some bands are a fawkn SHOW an entire production. More than just geetars and drums and a singer bleeding his heart out. I love both, I have to admit. I have been in the bar/entertainment industry the past 12 years and I am beyond grateful, actually humble by seeing so many talented artists in the Chicagoland area, Vegas, LA, Phoenix, Miami and so on. It fascinates me.

When I hear a song, a key, a chord or a verse that captivates me, there are times where I go thru an emotional frenzy, there are times I cannot control myself, there are times where I let myself go and become one with the music, and I don't even use psychedelics to do this, I just embrace it with all of me. There are songs that I listen to almost on a daily basis just to calm myself, to build myself, to push myself. Music motivates me to be a better artists, better man and overall, better human. If the song is about hate and destruction, I take in that hate and negativity and I let it fester in me, but I don't spread it like disease. It consumes me for a few minutes and it goes away. I suck it in and blow it out like some purple haze and I move on. The same goes for positive music, same exact scenario. But then there's those certain ones, those handful that I connect with on a level that feels almost inhuman, almost spiritual. I hear, listen, and feel in every inch of my mind, body and soul. It elevates me to a different level of existence.

When I meet someone that feels this deeply about music I want to share experiences. I want to tell them, I want to listen to them, I want to emphasize with them on a grid that may not even need words. To know there are other people who can fall vulnerably into this place are people I want to surround myself with.
And on that note, feel free to add your thoughts, feelings and experiences on this blog.

(In Regards to the song "Reptile," by NIN) (Me)
"There is something incredibly sexy, introverted and inquisitive about this song, this band, this genre of music... Its like opening up Pandora's box, it's like feeding into your sins, it's like ending up places you've always wondered about but were always too scared to visit. It's embracing the darker side of life, experiencing pain and pleasure at once, in a dark lonely room filled with innocence and betray and question... It's life."

Friday, April 11, 2014

The Weirdness of Dating

By Trevor A. Keveloh

Dating, man, what a fawkn crock of shit it can be. I mean, its fun and shit, but we all know its a pile of dogshit for the most part. We all start dating someone, everything is grand and in the end, we hate them or resent them for whatever reason. The most truthful and sad thing about dating, is you won't be with that person forever, you will eventually break up and go thru shit after that. It's the ugly truth about dating. No one dates just one person then marries them then spends the rest of their lives with them, that shit happens to like 1 in a friggin gagillion er summin.
We all date people for the most redic reasons. For the thrill, for the fun, for the comfort, to try and beat the odds, etc. I've dated some treats and I've dated some tricks and I have to say, it's all fawkn weird. Dating is like buying a used car or house or whatever. It's like, "Yea, I know a lot of memories were made up in that shit, but I'm going to make better ones." So you date that muthafawka and make some awesome memories and then you break up and you hate each other for allowing yourselves to go thru all that and in the end, break up and go on a fuck/booze binge with total randoms n shit.
Some people can't be alone, (I won't name names but she's a fawkn terd) so they swing from one relationship to the other. Like a fawkn uglyass monkey on a tree, going from branch to branch, making sure they have a firm hold of the next one before they let go of the current one. It just freaks me out with people though ya know? Like I get cars and houses, I like used shit and I like brand new shit. I like items to purchase with a story, a history a past to tell people that's cool. Like a bar conversation, or dinner with family and or friends, or whatever. Like, "The guy who owned this 79 Trans Am before me used to race this thing all over Joliet in the early 80's and got his first road head in it." You never wana say that about someone yer dating unless it's an accomplishment like, "This chic Im banging has never GUSHED like this before. First time I nailed and I ate that shit, I was all on it like a fawkn Mastro's steak, took my time on it and it oozed like it's never been touched before. That skank kept comin back for more and I treated that piece REAL nice while I spread the wealth and did some work on others. Then one day I decided to date it, later on it tasted like shit, so I threw it to some putz and now he can naw on my scraps." That kinda shit you can get away with, but seriously, dating is just weird. You pull up in some girls vagina like a traveling circus or an Army battalion and yer like, "We are setting up shop here for a while. Prolly not gonna live here forever, but just gonna camp out, eat, shit, piss, fart, get a blowie on occasion, then split and find something better." That's what weirds me out about dating kinda, like how many units have been thru that reservoir?
I don't think dating is wrong, I mean you HAVE to date right? Shit I didn't date for years upon years and just fawked n shit. I don't know how to give an analogy on that other than like, "Hey, lets just bomb that shit and cruise off into the sunset er summin." I enjoyed that no strings attached shit, so much easier. Then one day I got all fucked up with the wrong mindset and more so, wrong fawkn assholes and was like that leader of the battalion general and Im like, "This looks good to bang on for now, lets take a break from bombing muthafawkaz and fawk around in this gully."
Well whatever you take of this one, I don't really care. I was all like walking my dog today and thinking about it. Like these houses for sale like, "Come move in here. The previous owners made some great memories or made some shitty ones. Maybe they had their first kid here, maybe their 16yr old son was a jerkaholic and spooged in every room constantly, but it's OK, buy it." Shit like that get ma, ya know?

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

42

It all started with an idea, a dream, a way to live my life accordingly. Fantasies and dreams trying to make them come true, living in a wonderland, a world I don't even know. Puppy dogs and ice cream sunshine and rainbows, running horses with beautiful hair flowing in the wind. I don't believe everything I see, read, hear but I do believe what I feel, what manifests inside me. Its not some delusional manic shit, its truth, its instincts, its something telling me to go right instead of left... Its like that Jeff who lives in the basement movie. It all begins to make sense when you allow it to.

Reach up and onward or else you will never get to where you need to go. Be patient but be persistent. There is no blue print for anyone's life unless you stick to some over-fabricated pile of horseshit that you were taught at young age is what you are suppose to do. Do not do what you are suppose to do, do what you want to do, not what is expected or what is told to you.

Live your life the way you want too. Do not let others tell you what is right or wrong as they do not consume the same mound of flesh you do. Be good to people, be honest, be loyal to those who are worthy of this.

Disconnect from the evils of life, the evils of people, the ones who drag you down and hurt you. Surround yourself with people of positivity. People that share the same goals as you.

In this life if you want to dig ditches, dig with price. If you want to clean tables, clean with pride. If you want to be an engineer, do it with pride. Hard work is a lost art an art that has been forgotten by so many recent generations because the people teaching them have too, lost that art.

My goal when I graduated high school has been kicked, spit on, attacked, tortured, shit on, pissed on and so on. But the few have stood by my side and on the way to this road, I've gained a lot of supporters and gained a lot of negativity. Which means breaking ties and continuing to achieve this goal.

My "soul purpose" in this life is to create.